Yes, I'll be 12 weeks out tomorrow and I'm 50 lbs. down. I really can't say that it' been hard-well except for the first month was fairly unpleasant-but no worse than sitting in a small room with my family....ok maybe it was not that tough but you get my drift.
And it's become painfully aware that I'll need to buy some clothes at least a couple size smaller. I'm not sure how to get my size 30 brain used to the size 20 though. I'm told that it'll slowly come to me, after all i've been big for some years. I'm going to also start taking some pants and shirts in-as clothes are sooooo stinking expensive! A lot of my back fat has disappeared so my shirts are huge as well so because I love sewing-I'll be busy!!
I also found some darling patterns online and have been making things to wear next summer and for a trip to Florida in a couple months :)
I hope this finds you all celebrating Christs birthday in a festive way. Take a moment to pause, reflect on your blessings. And as always-don't forget to talk like a northerner!!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Trying to move on.....
This is a time for withdrawing your energy, attention, and efforts from the outside world and external goals in order to replenish yourself. Quiet reflection and attention to your inner world, your family, and the foundation that supports all of your outside activities, is called for. This is a time to "lie low".
This is what a good friend sent me after the loss of a friend. It was a tough loss-it always is. Like another said recently "each time we lose another sister to this hideous disease, my heart takes a hit". I couldn't have said it better.
I'm trying VERY hard to put breast cancer behind me. I'm a 4 year survivor and the oncologists will tell you that with each passing year, your chances of reccurance lessen. They say that if you may it to the five year mark-you're basically in the clear. They are wrong. It may be that a majority of women aren't re-diagnosed with cancer, that most will live a long life free of chemo, radiation and the obvious signs that you're a survivor. But then it happens. A sister from the Komen board will be hit again. It's as if you can't breathe and you tell yourself-let the air out. Can you even TRY to understand when you clearly can't. Will that person have the luxury of another Christmas with her family or watching her first born graduate from high school.....and finally, am I next? Am I next in line to get the news that the twinges in my back or legs are not the innocent pains that I thought they were?
Will there ever be a day when I can relax-enjoy the day for all it is without fear of having the rug pulled out? I had a life coach briefly and she explained the process of healing after treatment is over when you are trying to find a "normal" once more. Survivors go through "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder". Your suddenly thrust into this crazy unknown life complete with new rules-some that make sense but many that don't. In my case it was 14 months of handing my life over to strangers to poison me but for a good reason. And the treatment works too-for now.
Now seems to be all that we have. Now is enough for me to smile, laugh and enjoy today. Being a northerner means we are tough beings-tough to live in these harsh sub zero climates for months on end. Hardy, Survivor-whatever you chose to call me I'll answer to anything. I'm honored to walk shoulder to shoulder with these other survivors in good days and bad.
Rest In Peace Elizabeth Edwards. You were a bright star to so many sisters. You will live on in the hearts of many, a role model to all people as you lived and conducted your life with decency and kindness. You are now with your beloved son Wade who you spoke of often, your broken heart at losing him obvious.
We will all meet in heaven someday-and cancer will not be an issue.
This is what a good friend sent me after the loss of a friend. It was a tough loss-it always is. Like another said recently "each time we lose another sister to this hideous disease, my heart takes a hit". I couldn't have said it better.
I'm trying VERY hard to put breast cancer behind me. I'm a 4 year survivor and the oncologists will tell you that with each passing year, your chances of reccurance lessen. They say that if you may it to the five year mark-you're basically in the clear. They are wrong. It may be that a majority of women aren't re-diagnosed with cancer, that most will live a long life free of chemo, radiation and the obvious signs that you're a survivor. But then it happens. A sister from the Komen board will be hit again. It's as if you can't breathe and you tell yourself-let the air out. Can you even TRY to understand when you clearly can't. Will that person have the luxury of another Christmas with her family or watching her first born graduate from high school.....and finally, am I next? Am I next in line to get the news that the twinges in my back or legs are not the innocent pains that I thought they were?
Will there ever be a day when I can relax-enjoy the day for all it is without fear of having the rug pulled out? I had a life coach briefly and she explained the process of healing after treatment is over when you are trying to find a "normal" once more. Survivors go through "Post Traumatic Stress Disorder". Your suddenly thrust into this crazy unknown life complete with new rules-some that make sense but many that don't. In my case it was 14 months of handing my life over to strangers to poison me but for a good reason. And the treatment works too-for now.
Now seems to be all that we have. Now is enough for me to smile, laugh and enjoy today. Being a northerner means we are tough beings-tough to live in these harsh sub zero climates for months on end. Hardy, Survivor-whatever you chose to call me I'll answer to anything. I'm honored to walk shoulder to shoulder with these other survivors in good days and bad.
Rest In Peace Elizabeth Edwards. You were a bright star to so many sisters. You will live on in the hearts of many, a role model to all people as you lived and conducted your life with decency and kindness. You are now with your beloved son Wade who you spoke of often, your broken heart at losing him obvious.
We will all meet in heaven someday-and cancer will not be an issue.
Friday, December 3, 2010
An Awesome Thanksgiving!
I hope you all had a GREAT Thanksgiving-we sure did!! Our two daughters and their loved ones made it great in a crazy, peaceful way.
There were no less than 30 people at our daughter Carleigh and her finance Chris's new home. It was noisy and chaotic with children running circles and adults in every corner visiting. There were older children playing games on the tv and of course my dear hubby and his assistant Ashleigh cooking away in the kitchen while I pretended to know what I was doing as we set the food out in the enormous kitchen that I'm SOOOO jealous of!!!
Carleigh bopped around visiting and making sure that everyone was introduced and knew who they were speaking to while Christopher and some of the cousins were around a fire outside or in the garage.
It was reminiscent of my younger years when we would go out to my favorite aunty and uncles home. Aunty Bobby and uncle Robert had a big farm complete with the HUGE red barn and cows that would moo and chickens that would run around clucking as if to tell us get away!! I loved (still do) the cattle ad their sweet faces and soft fur. They have eyes that to me were the kindest most gentle eyes. And the horses were sooo beautiful and we'd take turns riding them-I'd tease my younger sister who was always to afraid to get on them.
A couple of times a year we'd get a few roasts and hamburger along with a couple of frozen chickens. I never put the true facts together of where they started......:( We would sit and visit in the house during the winter holidays as Minnesota winters are too harsh to be outside until at least June. We would play board games, put puzzles together or play barbies down in the basement. I still remember the smell from the wood stove that provided the warm and cozy heat that warmed our bare toes on the warm floors.
It's with pride and sadness as well that now our children are taking over the holiday entertaining. We gave up the huge family gatherings when we down sized from a 5 bedroom home 6 years ago and retreated to our humble 2 bedroom abode. And just in time for her first get together-Carleigh, Christopher and Erin moved into their first, perfect home. They took with them the dining room table that sat in each of our dining rooms only I was never able to use the two large inserts in it as our rooms weren't large enough-it fits perfectly in their dining room with plenty of walking room to boot! Oh and she's the the third generation of Kings to use that table as her parents, aunt and uncle and grandparents used it before her. My dear husband and I are so proud of that. The chairs were added later by uncle Rory and aunty Nancy as Grandma King had to use the chairs for heating the house one sparse winter.
So life turns as it always does-to another generation. Another time for children to practice all they have learned from their elders. I guess they were watching as they played games and frolicked during those sweet and wonderful years when they were young and care free.
Happy Holidays and Cheers. Take a moment this season to talk like a Northerner :)
There were no less than 30 people at our daughter Carleigh and her finance Chris's new home. It was noisy and chaotic with children running circles and adults in every corner visiting. There were older children playing games on the tv and of course my dear hubby and his assistant Ashleigh cooking away in the kitchen while I pretended to know what I was doing as we set the food out in the enormous kitchen that I'm SOOOO jealous of!!!
Carleigh bopped around visiting and making sure that everyone was introduced and knew who they were speaking to while Christopher and some of the cousins were around a fire outside or in the garage.
It was reminiscent of my younger years when we would go out to my favorite aunty and uncles home. Aunty Bobby and uncle Robert had a big farm complete with the HUGE red barn and cows that would moo and chickens that would run around clucking as if to tell us get away!! I loved (still do) the cattle ad their sweet faces and soft fur. They have eyes that to me were the kindest most gentle eyes. And the horses were sooo beautiful and we'd take turns riding them-I'd tease my younger sister who was always to afraid to get on them.
A couple of times a year we'd get a few roasts and hamburger along with a couple of frozen chickens. I never put the true facts together of where they started......:( We would sit and visit in the house during the winter holidays as Minnesota winters are too harsh to be outside until at least June. We would play board games, put puzzles together or play barbies down in the basement. I still remember the smell from the wood stove that provided the warm and cozy heat that warmed our bare toes on the warm floors.
It's with pride and sadness as well that now our children are taking over the holiday entertaining. We gave up the huge family gatherings when we down sized from a 5 bedroom home 6 years ago and retreated to our humble 2 bedroom abode. And just in time for her first get together-Carleigh, Christopher and Erin moved into their first, perfect home. They took with them the dining room table that sat in each of our dining rooms only I was never able to use the two large inserts in it as our rooms weren't large enough-it fits perfectly in their dining room with plenty of walking room to boot! Oh and she's the the third generation of Kings to use that table as her parents, aunt and uncle and grandparents used it before her. My dear husband and I are so proud of that. The chairs were added later by uncle Rory and aunty Nancy as Grandma King had to use the chairs for heating the house one sparse winter.
So life turns as it always does-to another generation. Another time for children to practice all they have learned from their elders. I guess they were watching as they played games and frolicked during those sweet and wonderful years when they were young and care free.
Happy Holidays and Cheers. Take a moment this season to talk like a Northerner :)
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